Last step is acceptance.

For the month of September, I am embarking on a journey that is 100% in the name of bringing awareness and funds to cervical cancer research through the BC Cancer Foundation. I’m embarking on a month long healthy living challenge, including going vegetarian for the month, as well as ramping up my exercise & eliminating processed foods and sugar – unless it’s from a fruit. Myself & an amazing group of ladies are using our voices & social media presence to bring attention to a very worthy cause - go us! #GirlPower, right? There’s more to this, and I urge you to check out my campaign page to hear about all the details, and to pledge a donation if you feel so inclined. Check it out, here . Thus far, it has been fun to be creative and avoid the easy option of meat. Keeping my protein levels up has been a bit more difficult, but that just means that more experimenting in the kitchen is called for: my favorite hobby. A challenge like this can’t be too hard when I’ll clearly be reaping the rewards of my hard work, right?

Well, mostly. If you have been following me for a while, you know that I like healthy eating, healthy baking and just health in general. However, there is a girl who lives inside of me, she’s a bit more, curvaceous, shall we say. And she, LOVES shit food. Fucking loves it. Cake in the office? Well, you know who’s starting the train on grabbing a slice or two. Donuts? Forget about it, half the time I’ve eaten two before I even realize what’s happened. Jake ordered poutine, and I ordered a side salad? As if I’m not going to steal a fry or 10. So, while this challenge is rewarding and I feel fantastic, those cravings are still very much there. Very, very much so. The poor girl, I rarely let her eat what she wants and have brain-washed her to think Zoodles are just as good as white pasta, if not tastier. They’re not, we both know it and it’s a serious source of contention for her. Let’s call her, Bitter Betty. 

So last night, I’m looking for something sweet. Something a bit more substantial than a banana or some strawberries, but also didn’t want to veer into the easy choice of toast with cinnamon & earth balance. So I’m rummaging through my pantry and this bag, lights up in the corner of my eye. It has a sunshine on the bag, and it’s looking hella fine. Like, just begging me to take a walk on the wild side and indulge. 

What were the contents of the bag?

God damn Prunes. Yep, the fruit that makes you shit. The fruit that every grandmother keeps in juice form in the fridge. The juice my mother fed me as little infant because I couldn’t manage to poop properly, which led to the infamous McDonalds diaper blow-out of 1990. How the hell they got into my house, in a COSTCO sized bag no less, I have no idea. But before I knew it, I was eating one. And it was satisfying! And then I ate another. And another. 4 down, and my sugar craving was gone, I was satisfied, and speechless.

So, the transition is now complete. I go to sleep at 9:30, I lecture my friends on the importance of health & wellness, I mutter at teenagers and judge their poor outfit choices while I’m driving, and now I eat prunes as a desert like snack. It’s been joked about in the past, and now it is absolutely official: I am Brianne Elizabeth Lutz, the world’s youngest (and childless) grandmother. Nice to meet ya.