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Friday, 27 November 2015

How to embarass yourself, take #342.

There's a fine art to royally embarassing yourself, isn't there? It has to have a balance of just embarassing enough to go red, stifle a nervous giggle or two, but not so much so that you want to crawl into a hole for a month. I've danced along this line numerous times, some might say I have a knack for it. Hey, everybody needs a life skill.

Well.

Enter, my handsome doctor. My handsome, young, stylish doctor. That I have to tell when my snot is a funny color, etc.

Having a hot doctor is quite the catch 22, because generally you see your doctor for grosser, unpleasant things, and listing off the gross things your body is doing to said handsome doctor, is mortifying in and of itself. Having to use the actual names of my private parts!? You mean you don't know what I mean when I say "my bits"!? Mortifying. Last year I went to see him and was smack in the middle of the flu, so my handsome, South African accented doctor got to listen to my chest and lungs and feel my fever sweaty back and forehead, whilst I sat there wanting to shrivel up. That illness then turned into a raging chest infection which further turned into pneumonia, so my visits with him during that 4 week period were miserable, phlegmy, sweaty and gross.

Now, I thought that would've been the worst of it, save for the time when motherhood enters my life and I'm sure brings with it a plethora of embarassing goodness, it does seem to go this way for me.

However, today I went in early this morning because I've had issues with being really tired, jittery and dizzy, and was thinking it was probably low iron or something like it, and I wanted a blood test. However, for the past week or so, I've had on and off sharp pains in my chest below my heart, when I would try and breathe deeply and wanted him to check on that too. Why not, right? So he listens to me breathe, listens to my heart, everything sounds fine. So then I'm lying down on the table and he's feeling around, pushing and poking around my stomach asking me if this felt uncomfortable. It does. "How have your poops been?" he asks. Instant red face, as if I want to talk about my poops with anyone other than my mother, sister and best friend. My live in boyfriend doesn't even know my poop habits - because I don't poop, hunny, no worries. "Umm, they've been less frequent lately than I'd like I guess.. every couple days?" I reply, trying not to giggle because I do that when I'm mega uncomfortable. "I would say you need to up your amount of fruit intake, the sugars in them are good for you & your colon, maybe especially try prunes." SO, as it would just happen to be, what I thought was a misplaced rib or a spasming muscle turned out to be: constipation. Try stifling that god damn uncomfortable giggle, it's tough.


Oh hey dark hole, you look comfy - mind if I crawl into you for the next week or so?

Monday, 26 October 2015

Let them eat soup.

The set up made me feel so profesh - obviously a necessary aspect to a winning meal.
What is it about Autumn and the inching closer everyday frost that just makes soup sound SO appealing? I mean, I like soup just fine all other months of the year, I've never met a tomato bisque I didn't like - but I can kind of take it or leave it, ya know? But the October/November/December - even January time of year? Soup is my first choice over any other meal. It may just be a coincidence that as of October 1st I'm wearing a parka jacket that's meant for snowboarding because I hate being cold, and soup warms every little crack and crook in your body and soul. Soup is like, a big ass body hug. And while soup is not at the top of Jake's suggested meals, if I put meat in it and have some sort of bread on the side, he's a happy guy. And in turn I'm happy because I know we're eating something that's so good for us - not that he gives two shits but I know he enjoys how happy it makes me ;).

So the coconut curry chicken creation from last night not only warmed me up in all the right spots, it also had just enough meat in there to satisfy the man of the house, AND it was Thai, so everyone wins. I had a can of coconut cream that I had the brilliant idea to use in lieu of creamo in my coffee, except it doesn't give the coffee a "creamy" look or taste, and just wasn't quite cutting it. Creamo, I just can't quit you. So to avoid having it go to waste, good ol' Pinterest came to my rescue, as it often does. The recipe is from here, but this wouldn't be a Breezy recipe without some substitutions in it, now would it?

Thai Coconut Curry Soup
Serves: 6 (HUGE portions mind you, I'd say closer to 7-8 if you're having medium sized bowls)
2 cans (14-ounce/400 mL each) of premium coconut milk - I only had one can so I subbed in 1 1/3 cups of unsweetened cashew milk
1 heaping tablespoon (20 mL) of Thai curry paste - I used 1.5 tablespoons but I love curry paste
2 chicken breasts, thinly sliced
2 cups (500 mL) of chicken broth
1 carrot, shredded - I used one giant carrot and easily got 2 cups out of it - for me the more veggies the better.
4 or 5 lime leaves
2 stalks of lemon grass, halved lengthwise, woody leaves removed -
2 tablespoons (30 mL) of fish sauce
the zest and juice of 2 limes
a small knob frozen ginger * I used the jar minced ginger and used about 1 teaspoon, slightly heaped
a handful bean sprouts
a 8 ounce (225 g) package rice noodles - I had cooked white rice needing to be used so used that - wouldn't do it again though I didn't love the texture result
1 bunch of cilantro leaves, rinsed well
2 or 3 green onions, thinly sliced
* I added in 3 heads of baby bok choy because I'm obsessed with it and the dark leafs pack in a serious nutrient punch

Portioning everything out serves 3 purposes: 1) way easier to assemble, not miss any steps. 2) It looks way prettier when it's in small portioned cups and 3) I remember watching my mom do the same thing with stir fry's etc, and it makes me feel so grown up. 

Sizzling chicken in coconut cream curry sauce - heaven in my small kitchen.
Scoop the thick coconut cream from the top of just one of the cans into a large stockpot set over a medium-high heat. Melt the cream, add the curry paste and stir for a few minutes until they begin to sizzle.
Add the cilantro roots and chicken and saute until the chicken is cooked through, about 5 minutes.

Add the coconut juice from the first can and all the contents of the second can along with the chicken broth, carrot, lime leaves, lemon grass, ginger, fish sauce and lime zest and juice. Simmer for 20 minutes or so.

Stir in the bean sprouts. Add the rice noodles, gently pushing them beneath the surface of the broth. Turn off the heat and let stand until the noodles soften, about 5 minutes. Rice noodles don't need to simmer like pasta to cook; they simply need to rehydrate in the hot liquid.

Stir in most of the cilantro leaves. Remove the lemon grass stalks. Taste and season with a touch more salt (or soy sauce) as needed - I felt like it was salty enough however, and I like salty foods. Ladle into large bowls and garnish with the green onions and remaining cilantro leaves.
Voila!
Now for the best part of this - this creamy soup is so good for you and practically guilt free - as far as creamy foods can go ;) I've been obsessed lately with using My Fitness Pal to track the breakdown of the recipes I make and was so delighted with the numbers on this one, it's going to be a new staple. There's only 305 calories per huge bowl, 37g of protein and only 15g of carbs - if you're on low carbs omit the noodles. And this gives you almost 50% of your daily intake of Vitamin C & A!
I'm not one to play with my food, but only a heartless person can ignore perfect baby bok choy roses!

Friday, 16 October 2015

Everybody has a happy place.

If I were to ask you where your happy place is, would you have just one? Numerous? I myself have 3.
See? Magical.

1) Our family cabin on the Shuswap Lake, it's absolutely magical.
2) Jake - I know, how cliche, but ask me if I care ;) and...
3) the Health food store.
Diverse, eh?

When it comes to health food; supplements, what minerals and nutrients and vitamins do what for our body, how do better absorb them by pairing them with other foods/nutrients, I can't get enough - I'm fascinated. Jake was watching baseball the other day and looks over at me to ask what I was doing on my phone. "Reading up about the benefits of Coconut oil again, I forgot a few".. He looked at me with the same enthusiasm as if I had just told him I was brushing up on grade 11 chemistry, but I find it just so interesting. If you were to browse my google searches, you'd find over 75% matching "Health benefits of _________" .. the other 25% would include how to wear specific articles of clothing, product reviews (I google reviews on EVERYTHING before I buy it, almost obsessively), and lastly but almost most importantly, puppies.. Doesn't everyone? But anyway, back to my top 3, I can spend an hour easily in health food stores, looking at different products, spices, supplements, etc. In fact, I did this just two days ago. I had to go in and get bee pollen and chia seeds and ended up cruising the aisles for half an hour before finally tearing myself away. I also ended up buying like 4 more things, but that's usually just par for the course.

Chia seeds have become a daily staple for me. They're chock full of wonderful ingredients like Omega 3's (great for hair, skin & anti-inflammatory purposes), tons of anti-oxidants, minerals such as magnesium, iron, potassium and calcium, fiber galore and pack a pretty powerful protein punch - wow alliteration, that's just how excited I am. Not only that, they have a pretty handy clean-eating hack if, like me recently, you've had a little too much fun on naughty foods and went a little (lot) bit too lax on exercising: they keep you full for hours AND are a serious helper in digestion. These little powerhouses expand almost 10x their size when mixed with liquids, meaning they fill up in your belly, keep things moving along (ahem), and offer you a healthy way to get back down to normal. In the morning I have been mixing 2 cups of water (half coconut half regular) with 1.5 tbsp chia seeds, letting it sit about 10 minutes to expand, shake the shit out of it to break all the seed clumps up, and then chug the whole thing. The texture may get you a little bit, but I don't even notice anymore.
Hello my little frog babies.. Now doesn't that make it seem way more appetizing!? :P
And because I just love weird shit, if you add 1 tsp of bee pollen to your mix like I did, well you've just made yourself a clean, green energy elixir - drink responsibly ;)
 If I'm in the mood for a little sweet something that I can feel good about, I'll mix 2 tbsp chia seeds, about 1/2 cup cashew milk and a drop (literally) of english toffee stevia and mix vigorously . I say literally a drop of stevia because truthfully I hate it and the chemical taste, but one drop is enough to do the job without me noticing the after taste. Let sit minimum 20 minutes and you have yourself a yummy little powerfood pudding. Add some fruit and you have a wonderful breakfast as well.

To break it down even further, here's a quick nutritional breakdown of these little buggers:
1 ounce (2 tbsp) contains: 137 calories, one gram of saturated fat, 11 grams of fiber, four grams of protein, 177 milligrams of calcium, and 4.9 grams of omega-3 fatty acids, 23% of your daily recommended magnesium and 12% of your iron - helllo





Thursday, 8 October 2015

Thanksgiving is coming..

I'm going to be honest, hard & fast with ya right now. Do you know what is most important to me when it comes to what I'm going to wear for Thanksgiving? The amount of food I can reasonably eat while still being mostly comfortable. There, I said it: my outfit has to be a direct correlation of how much food I'm planning to stuff inside me in one sitting without bursting. How do I achieve this? Easy, two outfit designs that'll be your best friend: high-waisted and or belted. You may be thinking I'm crazy, but hear me out: First of all, high-waisted keep everything tucked in, so while you're full, you don't have the added uncomfort of feeling like your food baby is hanging over your waistband- no beuno. Also if you wear something a little looser on the bottom and belt it like say a flannel dress, fit and flare dress or even a shift, again the food baby is hidden - with the added support of compression tights (insert hallejuuuuah emoji)
 

 Below are a compilation of the looks I will be rocking for our two dinners, one at my parents and one at Jake's grandmas. Thankfully neither of us come from families that do formal dinners, so while I like to be dressed up, I can still be cozy and comfortable - my favorite


For the casual dinner at my parents place: chic, but not sloppy or looking like I don't care. Cable knit sweaters are so cozy and feel very British, maybe that's what lends them the more swanky vibe?  Also, literally any excuse I can use to wear my faux fur scarf, I take it. I'm not exaggerating when I say it's probably the best fall/winter purchase I've ever made.



Lately I have been loving the look of dressing up plaid & flannel, and what's an easier way than wearing it as a dress?! I bought this one from Urban Outfitters which admittedly does have side slits, but that's not a dark slip underneath can't hide. It's comfortable, unsuspectingly chic, and feels so cliche Fall that I feel like I fell right out of an Autumn family photo. I'll take it ;) Add some booties and glam earrings and you have just the right amount of rustic and glamour.


Now, those of you that really do have the formal dinners, I got you covered too ;) I feel like it's every girl's mini secret that while dresses appear to make you look posh and put together (and like you spent a lot of time on your outfit), it's really the powerhouse of clothing. In the summer, it's the easiest thing to throw on and keep you cool; in the fall and winter, it takes an outfit and amps it up on the fancy meter, without doing much at all.
 And there you have it! Now all you have to think about this weekend is how to arrange your plate for optimal food coverage. You could be like my brother who makes a mote between his food so that nothing touches, but that takes up too much space. Personally I like to have everything together, family style. Last tip of the day: calories don't count during the holidays - but they do the next day so maybe throw a jog in ;)

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Thursday, 24 September 2015

Things that bother me, but really shouldn't.

The internet lately bums me out. Not the internet around here, the blogosphere that is lifestyle blogging, which is doused in lovely valencia-esque filters, internet perfect hair and wicked outfits (and currently smells like pumpkin spice). No, I mean the harsh reality that with the good of how accessible everything is thanks to the internet - like reviews on literally anything you can spend money on, the catch-22 that everyone's opinion is now just as accessible, no matter how wrong, skewed or just plain unnecessary it is.  The more ignorance and hatred and darkness that I see on the internet, the more I just want to become a technology-less recluse - and that's saying something because one of my favorite pastimes is to creep on people and take vain selfies. So, instead of letting myself be pulled down into the dark pit, I figured I would instead think of other things that really bother me, but shouldn't hold too much room in my heart or brain - it wouldn't leave room for the other really wicked things like my boyfriend's half grin and mint chocolate chip ice cream. Or peanut butter anything
^yep, that's the one. melt.
 
 A list of things that bother me, but really shouldn’t:

  1. Girls who wear leggings and crop tops as acceptable outfits.

  2. Girls who wear leggings and short shirts, as acceptable outfits.

  3. Slow wifi/No wifi – first. world. problems - but still annoying as fuck.

  4. Kids who just get their licenses who are driving brand new vehicles, when it literally took me a decade to achieve this. Also, 15 year olds with a newer edition iPhone than me.

  5. The fact that my boss’s 10 yr old son has a mega crush on our new administrator, when I’ve been around for 4 years and have never had said attention. Not even close. rude.

  6. Showering, am I right!? Especially leg shaving day.

  7. How bloody long my hair takes to grow, when some people I know and love can’t keep up to how fast theirs does – share the wealth peeps.

  8. People who don’t break eye contact when eating or drinking.

  9. The sound of Styrofoam.

  10. When people cut their food too hard and their knives squeak/scrape the plate.

  11. Walking through spider webs.

  12. Slow walkers.

  13. People who choose to drive yellow vehicles.

  14. Flyers & Junk Mail.

  15. Literally all paper mail unless it’s money or a letter/card.

  16. When I turn my computer on and try to do too many things at once and my shit freezes, but I continue clicking on things for a solid 10-15 seconds to really make sure.

  17. Posting numerous selfies to social media in a small timespan.

  18. OMG - GYM SELFIES. We get it, you work out

  19. The baby prostitute perfume my co-worker insists on wearing. For reference, it smells like a bushel of berries rolled around in cotton candy and were then doused in sugar.

  20. The fact that Netflix feels the need to play the opening credits on TV Shows. Literally, know your audience, ‘Flix.

And there you have it. Now, for me I am off to watch puppy videos, cats doing stupid shit, and drink some wine. That's enough internets for today. Follow my blog with Bloglovin


Wednesday, 23 September 2015

I'm just goin with it.




 

Jeans: Madewell, Dress: Asos, Boots: Aldo, Faux Fur: Chicwish - old (alternatives here, here)



when everything you have on is currently on sale - cha-chiiing

Lets discuss the dress/jeans combo I have going on that is giving me 2000’s trend flashbacks but in a way that I feel like, works -unlike the 00’s. But FIRST, Let’s talk about this "dress" specifically.  I ordered this dress for a wedding, to wear at the beginning of September. It was due to arrive on August 24th, but had no tracking – ROOKIE mistake. Well, August 24th came and went and no dress. Few days go by and I email and say, “hey, where my dress at?!” They say wait another week. No dress. Long story short, the dress never came in time, they couldn’t figure out where it went either and just refunded my money, since it was too close to the wedding to order another. Well, low and behold, what was on my desk two days ago, but THIS DRESS. 6 weeks late, and now apparently free as well – thanks asos and also, sorry asos, I promise I didn’t pull a fast one on ya. And, as we can all see, a “dainty, tea party/ semi casual fall wedding appropriate” dress IT IS NOT. Unless the invite is good for one vagina coming to the party too. Tea party at the church on top, porn star on the bottom.

Which brings us to this, the dress jeans combo. Following this post by Merrick the other week it got me thinking about how much more wear I could get out of my tunics by pairing them with my skinny jeans as opposed to just leggings, and this dress being experiment #1 I feel was a massive success. Maybe it’s the fact that Madewell cannot go wrong with their jeans (in my opinion), maybe it’s the wicked shoes, maybe this dress was meant to find me to all come together and make this magic. Or, maybe it looks horrendous and I was high when I got dressed, take your pick.



Friday, 4 September 2015

We need to talk about your flare.

You do want to express yourself, don't you? Ahhh thank you to Office Space for the opportunity of a killer opener. Anyway, perusing Pinterest last night while watching a docu-series on the worst mob bosses in history, as I often do, I was continuing my hunt for an updated denim wardrobe, updated just in time for fall. I was originally looking for new ways to wear some boyfriend jeans when flare jeans kept hitting my feed. At first my original thoughts were: "piss of Pinterest, you're drunk and I'm not p-interested" - I know, I'm on a roll here, but then the more washes I saw and the more versatile the outfits, my mind was definitely changed. You know what guys? I was digging what I was seeing, hard. The silhouettes were so feminine and flattering, and the new styles are slightly higher waisted meaning they slim your tummy and elongate your legs, something I am never one to turn down. I'm more of a pear shaped person, so I am leaning more towards the trouser/flare hybrid as opposed to full on bell bottoms, but for a more lean person, any silhouette you want will fit your fancy. You lucky ducks.

Couple rules for showing off your flare:

  1. This may be the only rule, but for the love of god, DO NOT wear flares with flats. Was that your plan? Read that first line as many times as needed to let it sink in, even if you are tall. It looks sloppy, they're meant to be worn with heels so if you don't wear them, you'll have a good couple inches pooling at your feet, and if they're short enough to wear with flats: You bought the wrong pair. Try again. If you're worried about added height, A) don't be, and B) a kitten heel will suffice.

  2. Even if you are going to wear something looser up top, ensure that your flares are very tailored to keep the ensemble chic and not sloppy. In addition, make sure you're showing off a little skin, be it collarbone or chest to show some shape and not look like a sack.

  3. Chunky knits with flares will more than likely be my go to, behind wearing them with a blazer, so again to ensure I won't be overwhelmed with fabric, I'll do the half tuck on my sweaters to maintain my shape while still being comfy and oh so chic.

  4. Go full boho, wear these with kimonos for as long as the weather allows for it. Channel your inner Rachel Zoe and wear a floppy hat too for bonus style points.


Some great options I found recently:

And below is just a sampling of how I would wear these for casual date nights or to the pub with friends, how I would wear for work, and middle road everyday wear. See? SO versatile.

flare casual work flare flare chunkyNext up, Denim Culottes! Just kidding, I'll never give into that trend. Me and my good ol faithful leg stumps dislike them greatly, as they would us. They belong in the "never going to fucking happen" category, alongside acid wash.

 

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

Fall, is coming.

The last few nights I have been chilly enough to actually cuddle my boyfriend for longer than 30 seconds, I can comfortably wear jeans throughout the day, and on more than one occasion lately - I've pulled out a sweater to wear. Pumpkin, maple sugar and "crisp leaves" scented everything is popping up all over stores.. Do you know what this means!? Fall is coming! The days of sweating all of my makeup off in less than 3 hours are coming to an end; sweaty bangs, your days are numbered (thaaaank fuck). Sorry to all of you who are heat lovers and blessed with lazy sweat glands, but this girl is pumped. And what comes with Fall? Well, every girl's favorite - according to Pinterest at least - FALL CLOTHES. Layers! Chunky Knits, Booties! Burnt Oranges, Burgundies, Mustard Yellow, Navy!

I will admit it is so much more fun to get dressed when it's chillier, but that's not exactly new information. There's so many more options, and so much more fun than just "okay, what's the least amount of clothing I can get away with wearing, that also won't show sweat marks?" Plus, well apart from one pair I will love to death, I really don't love wearing shorts - they're not my thing. Jeans? Get over here you little gaffers, I've missed ya so.

Now comes the fun part: what to add to our current wardrobe to make it Fall ready. I have made myself a little deal to not use my credit card as much as humanly possible, basically to get used to saving money again as opposed to spending it whenever the mood strikes me. I also want to focus on spending more money on one well made, versatile piece as opposed to many cheap options - they clog up my small living space, make my boyfriend go grey and just fall apart so fast. I've actually gotten pretty great at utilizing all my existing items in fun new ways, which doesn't quiiite replace the thrill of new clothes, but it does ensure I'm being creative - always a bonus. However, there are a few key items I want to add to my capsule this season, based on what I notice myself gravitating towards the most, be it items I've already worn to death, or always thinking "If only I had ....... item, this outfit would be perfect". Below are my picks:

fallupdates

  1. Boyfriend Jeans: I love love love my pair I bought from the GAP 4 years ago, but the distression on them have ripped (thanks, feet) which is fine for casual wear, but for work appropriate they're walking a thin line. I'd like to update my pair to one that still has distression, but in a much more subtle way that can still look polished with a blazer.

  2. Black skinny jeans. I own about 4 pairs, all but one were cheapo buys because I wasn't sure I would wear them enough. What was I thinking?! They go with everything, feel like leggings but are classic enough to be worn for work, for play, for anything really. I have my eye on this pair from Madewell, but until the dollar figures it's shit out, they won't be coming to me anytime soon. I bought a pair of straight jeans from Madewell in the spring, and they may be the best jeans I've ever purchased. On the expensive side, but more than worth your money.

  3. Chunky knit in an "autumn" color. How original right? I have a new found love for the cardigan, and while I wear my old Aritzia navy one to death, I want to add one in mustard yellow or burgundy to the mix. Cozy, and enough color to pop up a basic outfit.

  4. Not shown: Black crew neck sweater. Surprisingly hard to find one I love, but I am incredibly picky with these. They have to be ribbed at the bottom, or at least have enough ribbing to hold their shape, but I do not want it to be fitted. A great place to find them is actually in the men's section, I find they're better quality and less expensive - rude for the ladies, but I'll take advantage of it.

  5. Striped pencil skirt. Great for layering, more interesting than a basic pencil skirt, and can be worn with bare legs well into November, and with tights once the snow falls. Also on the hunt for a floral print too.

  6. Navy booties. I'm a massive supporter of booties, aka I pretty much wear them exclusively in the fall and winter. Last year I bought a burgundy pair from Aldo and I am still totally infatuated with them, and this year I want to venture into the world of Blue Suede Boots ( thanks for the pun opportunity, Elvis ;) )


Stores I will be utilizing for most of my shopping endeavors (that also accept PayPal and show their pricing in CAD -KEY ASPECTS!): ASOS, Urban Outfitters, Zara, Aritzia & Forever21 <- I just can't quit you, F21. Mainly because your baseball tee's are mint.

And finally, to round out this long-winded, making up for lost time post, a smattering of outfits I've worn lately - photographed because I learned the art of the Outfit Lay and I am obsessed. 


[gallery columns="2" size="medium" ids="2160,2157,2156,2158,2159,2161"]






 

Tuesday, 14 July 2015

you smell like home.

It's been a while, hasn't it? You haven't missed much on my end; I haven't been doing too much insightful stuff, other than learning the art of mastering the 3 minute dutch braid half up-do, because unless you currently live in Australia, it's pretty fucking hot.. everywhere. And well, I have healthy sweat glands which means, summertime heatwaves, my hair & I get along like cats and dogs. Like Sophia Loren's side-eye & Jayne Mansfield's boobs, if you will. Jake & I will cuddle for all of 10.34 seconds when we climb into bed, before both of us go "god you're so fucking hot", "oh why thank you babe, I think you are too", "no seriously, no more cuddling" .. it's all very romantic in the fiery armpit of hell that is our upstairs in the summer.



When it comes to braiding, I have the agility of someone with two left hands and club thumbs, so I'm pretty impressed with my dutch braiding abilities - mainly because it's the only one I can do so it gets a lot of mileage.

I went to Nanaimo over the weekend to trade in my old car for a new one, and you guys, my life has changed. My old car earned me the reputation of having a homeless person living in it because it was always full of shit, but this one? No, this one will be staying pristine. Case in point, I ate a sandwich on the way home while driving, and didn't move until I could get out and shake the crumbs off of me. 4 hours. I also got lost not once, not twice but three times trying to find the exits to get said sandwich, one of which included me getting on the exit back towards the coast, which resulted in me going "oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck" repeatedly until I was sure I had managed to get back on track, 30 minutes later. Directions, never been a strong suit of mine.. #gotitfrommymama.
i tried therefore

I also realized while shopping in the girls/tween department for my 10 year old niece, that training bras are NOT what they used to be. As in, they're kinda cute, good cup support but no underwires..  I was thisclose to legit buying one for myself, because as a lifer of the IBTC, apparently the tween section is a section I don't need to avoid when looking for bras. Fantastic. The overwhelming sense of judgement coming from my sister being the only thing that stopped me. girls



Now, while I was in Nanaimo, Jake was in Vegas for a bachelor party. I know, why didn't I start off with that since it must have been the highlight of my month, right? What girlfriend isn't stoked about her boyfriend going to Sin City for a stag?! Anyway, when I picked him up at the airport on Sunday, Vegas had clearly kicked the shit out him, and stolen his voice at the same time. When we got home - after grilling him the entire car ride.. I mean, asking him what he and the boys did ;) - he could not have gotten into bed fast enough and demanded I not leave his side. Pretty cute actually, when they're so hungover that they're near death and beyond affectionate, obviously I'm going to comply. Wrapped up in his arms I had to laugh because, dude smelled like a bar well. I was giggling and said "Oh babe, you need to shower. I love you, but you smell like Vegas." His response? Smelled my hair, sighed a little, and said "You smell like home." unnamed (1)

Melt. You wanna say things like that, maybe you can go to Vegas bachelor parties more often. Just kidding, over my dead body are you doing that again.

Monday, 1 June 2015

karma manifests as a blow horn.

In grade 9 science class, my friend Mia and I were comparing our new belly button rings  - totally serious - when one of the boys in our class decided to be a dinkus to Mia. I told her not to worry because Karma would eventually get him. Well, not 10 minutes later, the pen he's chewing on explodes in his mouth. Gross, but Karmatic Justice at it's finest. Mia was a converted believer, and I've always been reminded that whether you believe it or not, karma is real. From smoking my head on something after thinking something particularly rude, an ex getting what's coming to them after they treated me horribly, etc, it's been proven time and again that Karma is very much real, and you don't fuck around with it. Unless it's hilarious.

Now, cut to a month or so ago, Jake had a hockey tournament in Kelowna, and Mia decided we should get blow horns for the game. Genius idea, really, and hilarious because Jake got into a bit of a fight on the ice and I was definitely that girlfriend blowing the air horn at him. We also blew them whenever they scored and trust, we were super popular ;) unnamed

Enter Karma. The hilarious kind.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehSFNK2ZjP8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvxcZp_Ez7Q&feature=youtu.be

How can you be mad with a giggle like that? Sneaky little bastard. He's lucky I love him, and am currently waiting for a truly epic hangover wake up call opportunity. Love is graaaand people, it really is.

Friday, 1 May 2015

Musings for Fridays.


  1. Have you seen the articles positing that the "dad bod" is the new thing women my age early-mid twenties - find most attractive? Uhmm, horseshit. I call stinky, smelly horseshit. Now, I'm not saying you should be ashamed of your body if it does in fact resemble a "dad bod", but like.. Ryan Reynolds' vs. Leonardo DiCaprio's bod? Is it even a question on who would win that?! Personally I find taking care of yourself to be the most attractive, and generally - that does not equate to a beer belly. Maybe I'm biased because my boyfriend has sahh-weeet abs (high five to me!), but I gave a major eye-roll at those articles. Ps, Leo, Leo Leo Leo, I am SO dissapointed I just used you for that example. RIP Jack Dawson indeed.

  2. Now, I am a selfie enthusiast. If you follow my instagram, you know I'm not one to shy away from.. myself? Or just my forward facing camera. BUT, I heard a "couple selfie" today being referred to as an "ussie"... Let. that. sink. in. Did you almost throw up a bit in your mouth? Just me? Because, guys, grossss. Gross! That's as gross as social media'ing anniversaries that are anything other than yearly. Nobody cares that you made it 3 months, keep that shit to yourself. underwood

  3. Banana ice cream is my new jam. I had it for breakfast twice this week, and devoured it in my bed with chocolate chips when PMS may or may not have reared her ugly, broken out face - hint hint, she totally did. What is this magic, you ask? Frozen bananas, enough milk (I choose cashew because it is so so creamy but very low cal) to get it moving in your food processor/blender, and viola! It turns into the consistency of ice cream, but it's fruit. Not to mention bananas are ridiculously good for you. Add in literally whatever else you want, I did vanilla protein/blueberries for one breakfast and matcha powder, vega protein/greens for the other. Jake looked unbelievably horrified at the last one, but no sweat off my back that he doesn't want to share, matcha powder is expensive, yo ;)

  4. Grey's Anatomy. Like, WOW. If you haven't seen it yourself yet (how!?) and the internet hasn't ruined it yet for you either (again, HOW!?), I won't be the one to do so. But let's just say my boyfriend was so embarrassed for me when I came downstairs and couldn't talk about how "nothing bad is ever allowed to happen to you" without moving into a fresh batch of ugly sobs.. on his shoulder.. while he was watching the Stanley Cup playoffs - life tip, don't ever expect sympathy, attention, affection, or even conversation when your guy's team is playing an elimination game - emotional trauma included, apparently.

  5.  Has your week been on the shittier end of the scale? Not anymore. You. Are. Welcome.


 

 

Wednesday, 8 April 2015

Are you saying I have a problem or something?

Many of you may not be familiar with Vernon's retail offerings; similarly all of you may be familiar with Vernon's retail offerings. Point is, other than some hippy-dippy stores (no hate, I love them), liquor stores on every corner and enough dollar stores to keep us stocked on mockolate and fake flowers for years to come, the shopping here is shit. Not the shit, just shit. There's maybe one or two decent stores, but our mall is quickly becoming a prime candidate for the tour of deadmalls.com (insert serious sniffly face for target; I hardly knew ye), stores are dropping like flies. So, as a fashion lover and someone who doesn't want to rely on winners solely to have the items I need want, my real option is online shopping - which I love. Some would say a little too much, I'd probably agree with you, but whatever.

Well.

Lately I've been having some shade shade shadiness being thrown at me by some of my favorite people: the gentlemen who deliver my goods. As the old saying goes, the ones you love hurt you the most, right? It all started with the UPS guy, "another pair of shoes hey?" - which, thankyouverymuch, were not for me but in fact a gift for my boyfriend. Second was the Purolator guy, who when he delivered a Forever21 parcel two days in a row (the shipments got split up I SWEAR) remarked "it's okay I get it, you're not the only girl in Vernon with a Forever21 addiction". THEN, when he hadn't made a delivery in a while goes, "Where have you been? It's been a while." Pfft.  Yesterday was the icing on the cake, when the Canada Post guy gave me a wink and said "Another one hey?". He happened to be holding two silk blouses I got on sale for 70% off; 70%!!! I meeean, shouldn't he instead be applauding my bargain hunting abilities? How about a little positivity gentlemen? I won't pretend I'm not a little hurt.

Although I'm going to be honest, the shame I feel may be enough to have me put that money elsewhere, like my savings account. It may be the judgement, it may be the fact that I have no more possible room for clothing, it may be the fact that we're now looking at buying a house in the next year, or it may be a combination of all that. Either way, it worked. Cecilia the Credit Card is going into hibernation, and my savings account is thanking the deliverers of UPS, Purolator and Canada Post, because let me tell you no one else has been able to put a cap on me.

unnamed (3)How could you say no to the perfect breezy silk blouse? You can't, which is why I also got it in baby pink.

Tuesday, 31 March 2015

the Lob, the Clavicut, and me.

Other working title: "How I fried my once perfect hair and the road taken to get it back to what it once was", also working title: "Fuck you, box hair dye". LAST working title: "please, learn from my mistakes; do as I say, not as I do". because, seriously.

unnamedUnless you have been hiding under a rock, you've heard all about the lob, or as I once heard it being referred to "the clavicut", because the style hits just at your clavicle. toted as one of the most versatile cuts, it's been everywhere - from I feel like a new celebrity daily debuting it on instagram, to some of my favorite bloggers & fashionistas.

Now on to me. Remember when I was so proud of re-virginizing my hair? Yea, I promptly ruined that title for myself. My problem is two-fold: I get bored and antsy, and I never learn my lesson that when it comes to hair, being bored and antsy and spontaneous doesn't always work, In fact, when it's a DIY job, it rarely works. So cut to last March, and I have my beautiful highlighted once virgin hair that is long, thick and healthy - but has some roots coming in therefore I was getting itchy for a shake up. Jake & I were talking one day and he mentioned off hand that he really likes dark hair, and wondered what I would look like with it? Well, being the lovestruck dummy that I was, I thought "Well if he likes dark hair, why not dye mine? I've had dark hair before and loved it, why not go dark again?" mistake #1. Sorry babe, but I shouldn't have listened to you. Mistake #2: DOING IT MYSELF. Because level 8-9 blonde hair is not going to take dark dye nicely, if it's even the right shade (because those boxes LIE - "light golden brown" my ass), more often than not the first application will turn out a mousy, ugly redish brown. Now a smart, rational woman at this point woulda thought to herself "oh, this was probably a bad idea. I should phone my hair stylist, let her yell at me and then have her salvage it" - but not this lady. No no, she dyed it twice more, to achieve that lovely dark dark chocolate brown. Which is not to say I didn't like it, I did! It was shiny and lovely and in my opinion really made me eyes stand out. Problem was that I had now deposited some serious damage into my hair, and it was dry and getting frizzly, and since my hair was so porous from being so light, was fading faster than I would've liked, so - you all know what I did next, do I even have to say it? I dyed it again. At home, again. To quote my girl who has seen me go down this road so many times "Brianne! Do you seriously not learn every time you do this to yourself!? When has this ever turned out well for you?! Fuck sakes". To the point that Danielle, to the point.

So now we get to the fun part. 4-5 months after I’ve dyed it, gotten it professionally done finally and had my hair pretty much settle, the blonde memories come flooding back. The, “my blonde hair was soo pretty” nostalgia - those get ya deep in the heart strings. So I promptly texted Candice (hair guru) what we could do to take it back to somewhat it’s former glory – did I mention I had gotten it dyed not even 2 weeks prior by her? I’m sure she wanted to punch me. But, still I made an appointment for a few weeks later to start slowly – I full well knew this was going to be a long process -  with some ombre and balayage painting and well, no surprise – it didn’t lift much. 2-3 more lightening processes, Candice specifically telling me she wasn’t going to dye my hair dark ever again, cursing the makers of Nice & Easy and the color deposits they leave behind, praising the gods that invented K-Pak treatments, and my hair had gotten to the point where I either had to leave it as is, or chop it off to allow my hair to get some of the health back and continue on lifting. Thankfully, all of the stages my hair went through I really liked, but my eye was on the blonde prize.

Enter the clavicut.unnamed (1)

Now, I’m not going to lie, I was super nervous to chop my hair. With all the breakage, it wasn’t even that much of a chop, 3 inches with some weight taken out. But we ladies, for me atleast, a lot of my confidence lay in my strands. I feel sexier, prettier, skinnier (? Don’t judge, I know I can’t be the only one) with long hair. But, you guys. This cut. There is a reason it is so damn popular: it fucking rules. First day hair, second and third day hair, braids, it all works with this cut. Quite possibly one of the most versatile and fun hairstyles I've had in a while. I can even do some fantastic little up-dos with it that appear much more difficult than they actually are. unnamed (2)Moral of this long winded story? Get a lob, or a clavicut, or whatever you want to call it, get one. Just don't fry the shit out of your hair first - no bueno.

Wednesday, 25 March 2015

what's next.

unnamed (5)It's been a while, and the honest answer to why that is, is because I've been struggling to figure out the direction of this blog - and if I even want to continue on with it. Feeling like I can no longer find or even have the voice that gave this blog life, that gave me the creative outlet to share my funny anecdotes, my love of fashion and styling, and just to have a diary of my early twenties in the digital era.

Lifestyle & Fashion blogging is an increasingly overly saturated part of the internet, so what makes my voice unique? What makes my style and my voice one that will stick out over the thousands of other girls who have a love of kimonos and stripes? I've been struggling to decide if this is something I still want to do and if I decide I do want to continue with it, what is the certain thing that makes me unique and interesting? To be frank, I don't know that answer quite yet.

I've been reflecting quite a bit over the last several weeks and months, and I realize that this is a pretty accurate depiction of what my life looks like at the moment: pretty undecided. Do I want to stay in the career I'm in, is it enriching my life or just paying my bills? do I even want to stay in this city or do I want to branch out somewhere new that isn't familiar? Since turning 25 I've hit a bit of a fork in the road, and don't know whether I want to stay on the path of comfort, familiarity and "easy", or go down the road I never take which is risky, unknown and not certain. I always had a picture in my head of what my life would look like when the quarter century number hit, but reality hasn't entirely unfolded the same way my vision assumed it would have; leaving me feeling like there may just be a different path more suited for me that my love of comfort was shielding me from looking into.

When you're 13 and looking up to the adults in your life, they don't tell you this about adulthood; sometimes the decisions that come with the responsibilities is enough to make you want to crawl back into your fort and hibernate for a little while longer. unnamed (1) unnamed (3) unnamed (4) unnamedSide note: this leopard print laptop case may single-handedly become the best purchase of 2015. 4 months in and not much has beaten it - yet.

Thursday, 26 February 2015

Coming to you from Cabin Fever

Well, I'm going on day 6 of a minimum 7 day bedrest after my cervical leep surgery. I tell ya, it's been a lot suckier than I thought it was going to be. Not being able to do much is an understatement, My couch and I have become the closest of friends, and I feel like I personally know all the Real Housewives of Beverly Hill's botoxed little souls. Thank goodness for my mom and dad being here so they can come keep my company, and there's nothing like a mama taking care of you and making sure you always have tea, and a dad to clean your floors for you so atleast while you feel rotten, your house does not.

  1. Day 1 of bed rest I figured I wasn't in too bad of shape, so decided to walk to the mailbox to get my new stickygram magnets, and take the recycling out at the same time. That ended in me staying on the couch for the next 5 hours ish, not including bathroom breaks. BUT I did master the Miley Cyrus bun (we all stared in envy at her top knot/fun-bun skills back then, don't you lie.) exhibit A & B
    photo^^My secret was 4 day old hair that had previously been blown out, makes for a very workable curl. That and the grease ;)

  2. It's absolutely gorgeous out lately, nothing but blue skies melting the snow. Which naturally has gotten me thinking spring outfits. It may be because all I've been wearing lately is lounge clothing, but I cannot stop thinking about printed tuxedo pants, and figuring out how to wear pajamas without looking sloppy. Obsessed with this pair from free people, and this pair from madewell for a more structured feel. Pair with a blazer and pumps, jean jacket and booties or crop top for a night out - they make the statement while you're comfy - win win! I've also found myself wishing that nighties were appropriate to wear out, although the way I dressed up my striped lace one with this fisherman's sweater and leggings, I kinda think I nailed it. blog photo

  3. The beautiful weather mixed with me not being able to move much has given me the strongest craving to go for a run. Ha. I am pretty gung ho that I'll start jogging more this spring, I'm going to start off realistically and settle for fast walks for now :).

  4. Feeling like this spring's wardrobe will be Parisian themed; simple colors, lines and simple pieces. Like this long sleeved striped crop top and black linen midi skirt - so chic but simple. This outfit can be dressed up or down so many ways - with a jean vest and sneakers, floral flats and a blazer, or my leopard scarf and booties. blog photo 2

  5. I have re ignited my K-Pak obsession. Two uses and my hair feels so much healthier and silkier. If you're hair is feeling a little bit on the frazzled side, get yourself the reconstructor/hydrator duo and your tresses will thaaank you.

  6. Netflix has been my savior. Grey's anatomy, Friends, Call the Midwife, Austin Powers (!!), they've kept me from going crazy.

Friday, 23 January 2015

WIW, plus a story or two.

BLAZER fur fur skirtI recently saw a meme on instagram the other day that had the caption: "If she shaves your legs in the winter, she really loves you, bro." and I instantly thought.. HA. Ha Ha Ha, clearly a dude wrote that. Because I love my guy more than anything, but my leg shaving habit becomes preeettty rare in the wintertime. How I would have worded that is: "If she shaves her legs in the winter, you've only just started dating, bro." Every girl knows how annoying it is when you shave your legs, only to get cold the second you hop out of the bathroom and have the goosebump stubble happen. I KNOW I'm not the only one this happens to. But as I geared up for my bi-monthly leg shave session yesterday (I want to say I'm exaggerating, but that's probably pretty on point), I was doing such a hurried job that I knew I for sure had razor burn in my future, and then I thought to myself, why are my legs not used to this by now?! I've been doing this for longer than a decade, and the skin still isn't tough enough to withstand a little razor? Come on legs, I thought better of you. I mean like, I've never taken a chunk out of you while shaving, you think you could do me a solid and toughen up. Meet halfway kind of deal.

Now on to another tale from the bathroom, because why not. My skin has been really bugging me lately, nothing insane or anything, just a little more splotchy than I'm used to. Well, I had a mean little zapper on the side of my forehead - THANK YOU, bangs, for always bein' there in crisis's like these - but I managed to squish it pretty quickly. Well, I'm washing my face a couple nights ago and have my hair up in a headband, and I see Jake literally zero in on it. "Yes yes, I know it was a nasty one.. I'm aware of it" is what I said before he could even make a comment.. "Yeah, well that's good.. Don't know how you could have missed it though."..

Now THAT, is love. None of this clean shaven legs crap. Real love is when your boyfriend can make you laugh about the big ol' post apocalyptic zit on your face, and say it in the way that still makes you feel pretty, and have it make you giggle for days after.

-This is totally what classy fashion bloggers write about.. right?

Friday, 16 January 2015

brought to you by sushi & a healthy amount of wine.

suhi

Look at that glorious dinner I have prepared (ordered and poured) for myself. and yes, that is still my Charlie Brown tree kickin' it in the background.. Jake decided to have dinner with a buddy on his way home from work tonight, and at first I was a little bummed, and then I thought - raw sushi all to myself. And a generous glass of wine to toast to the weekend. Done deal, I'll see you in a couple hours babay.  It's Friday! We've all made it to the weekend - sorry if you're a server or retail worker.. sucks to be you. A few highlights, thoughts & moments of my week, to those of you that find this kind of thing interesting - hey mama <3.

  1. I have come to the conclusion, as so evidenced by my dinner of choice, that I could eat Thai & Japenese food for the rest of my life, and be very happy. On alternating days of course so I don't get too bored, but my goodness do I love me some sashimi and Tom Kha Gai.

  2. If you follow her, you know that Amber of Barefoot Blonde has unbelievable hair. Like, we're talking real-life barbie hair. She put up a tutorial recently that I attempted to emmulate myself. Now, I could only do the top part of it because I have roughly 1/8 the amount of hair she does, but I was pretty impressed my teeny bangs stayed in the braid all day! Score. bfb hair

  3. 3. While on the subject of hair, I am desperately seeking blonde over here. Numerous box dyes and dark colors and my hair just ain't havin' it. My hairdresser even said to me at my last visit "Let's not go dark again okay?"

  4.  So you know when you read in the news about all the phone call scams and how many people for it? I always am judgemental, I always think to myself "Have some common sense here, how are people so gullible?!".. Yeah well, after today, I'm apparently one of those people. I called the customer service line for one of our companies today, and it rings twice and goes to an automated message about completing a survey to be entered to win a cruise. It didn't give the option of opting out, so I completed the easy 4 question survey, and whaddyaknow, I won! Now, because this call came from a legit company, I was still hesitant but not gonna lie, pretty damn excited. So yea, I won a Caribbean cruise, could cash it in any time in the next 18 months, and all it's going to cost me is the docking fee for myself and Jake. While I'm on the phone I'm googling this company to see if it's a scam, but at the same time I'm snapchatting Jake telling him I'm preeeetty sure we just won a trip. Alas, when the overly southern woman would not allow me to verify them and make sure this was legit before handing over my payment details, I figured it was definitely too good to be true, and hung up. But man, those 3 minutes I had as a Caribbean cruise winner were goood, let me tell you.

  5.  I'm about 6 months late to this party, but Let It Go is definitely my new "singing my private concert in the car" song. If you don't know what I'm talking about (aka you don't have children under 14, either), you'll be hooked. Sorry in advance.

  6.  my brother got himself a little fur baby, a french bulldog named Georgia. Look at all that squish! I'm obsessed. If I didn't live in a teeny tiny condo with 30 stairs to our door and no yard, I'd have her sister in a heartbeat.

  7. unnamedSpeaking of this teeny tiny place of ours, I'm definitely ready for an upgrade. No dishwasher and about one foot of counter space really gets to a girl, how can I make fancy dinners if I can't spread out? I mean, I probably still wouldn't with more space, but I'd like the option.

  8. Friends. The entire series on NETFLIX. And my boyfriend loves the show as much as me, aka we watch it together in bed. My goodness, he's just swell.


Now, back to my wine. TGIF, friends :)

B