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Tuesday, 25 April 2017

Domesticated AF.


Welcome to my new series on the blog, about my foray into home ownership, how it differs from condo ownership, and the trials, triumphs, and wtf's that come with it.

Maybe I’m dating myself here, or I’m alone in this, but was anyone else a Charmed fan back in the day? Just me? San Francisco + Witches + Sisters, like what more could you ask for? Anyway, there was a specific episode where Piper & Leo got engaged, and she wore her grandmother’s engagement ring. Long story short, the ring was enchanted and it turned her into a domesticated, 50’s housewife. Now the storyline there was a lesson that didn’t have a nice ending (the grandmother hexed the ring to teach her never to lose herself in a marriage, and therefore never get married again, yadda yadda). But still, the change it made in Piper initially, is what I can use this for as reference. 

I feel like this house/my ring have the same enchanting effects on me, but in a good way. Since moving in, I have become more domestic than I have EVER been in my life, and am finding myself not only taking care of my home routinely, but I am enjoying it. As I have been saying to myself, I am Domestic, AF. (Mom, AF means as fuck). Things are happening to me, things are changing and what used to be such a chore that I would just leave it for days - FINE - weeks, I now do when it’s needed, and routinely. My kitchen is dirty? Old Brianne would leave it a few days and just ignore the chaos, but DAF Brianne? She cleans the kitchen as she goes along, keeping the mess to a minimum. What!? Any additional dishes are done, dried and put away. That DAY. Bathrooms are done on Saturdays, and floors are vacuumed and mopped (steam mops! #lifechangers) on Sundays.
Look at that SHINE! Shine baby, Shine. 


To highlight how extraordinary this is, at the condo there used to be parts of the house that would collect massive hairballs, and in all honesty we’d only vacuum once they got mega gross. In this house? I don’t even know if hairballs accumulate in the same way, because I vacuum too often for them to accumulate.

I make my bed 90% of the time before I go to work. I keep our bedroom fairly clean, and hang my clothes up once I take them off, not 3 weeks later. I am saying “I” instead of “We”, because Jake is a fairly tidy guy to begin with, so he’s just as pleased that this enchanted little ring came with some added benefits.

We have lived here for just a month, and I have hosted our families 3 times. This last instance, was just on Sunday and I made a wonderful French toast bake. The bread for said French Toast Bake? Made. From. Scratch.
Now, I was a total blogger fail because I forgot to take an after pic of it baked, but me oh my it was delicious, and will be made numerous times again, so next time I will snap a picture! with beautifully curated details in the frame to make up for this fail. And yes, I use old school pretty recipe cards because I am DOMESTICATED! A! F! 

And you know what? I f-cking love it. I love this new role I'm settling into. It's fun! I enjoy it! I don't know if I'm in the honeymoon stage (probably), but I really hope I'm just making habits that last because oh baby, the difference a clean happy house makes.



Next up on the series, Yardwork and all of its gross glory. And, dear God, house Crocs. 

1 comment:

  1. This post brings to mind a sex education/advice call-in TV show episode from about 25 years ago. A young woman called in to ask if there was anything wrong with her for enjoying sex with her boyfriend so much. As in every day and all the time. The show host was a lovely grandmotherly woman and she said, "Honey, one day things will probably change but for now, just ENJOY it." (-;

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