Things I think when I peruse Pinterest

Sometimes, when I'm wasting numerous hours on pinterest, I come across certain pins, and in my head, before I can even help myself, my inner biznatch makes little remarks at the obvious disaster that pin would become in real life. Because as my boyfriend so lovingly likes to remind me, I'm a sarcastic biatch. sometimes.

Thoughts I have while perusing Le Pinterest:

1. "My most popular blog post, how to achieve platinum/white blonde hair at home"... Was your second most popular post, "How I made the buzzed hair look hot again once my hair stopped melting off my head." ?


2. "To straighten hair without heat, just mix a cup of water with 2 tablespoons of BROWN sugar, pour it into a spray bottle, then spray into damp hair and let air dry"... Umm yeah, how about NO.


3. "Remove blackheads with white school glue." Not going to lie, I may actually try that.


4. "The Military Diet! Lose 10lbs in 3 days"... And then cry yourself to sleep when you gain 12 back the second you eat normally again.


5. "The healthiest smoothies recipes to lose weight!" People, the ingredients had ICE CREAM in them... I..Just..Can't. 


6. "DIY Sugaring - Hair Removal".. I can already tell you how that's going to go down, I hope you didn't like the first layer of your skin, or your cool with a wicked rash.


7. "No Heat: Straightening/Perfect Waves/Ringlets" Unless your hair is naturally that way, you're being played, fooool. 


8. I could do those aztec inspired nail art tutorials, OR I could have a life and save myself the 4 hours and patience it will cost me.


9. ANYTHING followed with the tagline "Just Girly Things"/"Things Boys Do That We Love"/"Perfect Girl Bucket List" Some of the items are, but not limited to: Get a 6-pack, meet the Kardashians, and meet a boy with a goofy smile. Dream big girls, dream biiiig.


10. "10 exercises to burn 200 calories in 3 minutes". And I'm out.

And, because a post isn't really a post without a pic or two, I thought I'd introduce you to my new babies, Hattie & Beatrice. Peculiar names for African Violets, non? Well, I love old British names for our future (currently non-existant) children, and Andy promptly veto's my choices, so hence, they have now become the names of my Violets. Beatrice is looking decidedly less plush than Hattie is, maybe I should stop telling her about what's going on in our world, it only depresses her. {But I mean really, Hattie & Beatrice Violet? Adorable. I really should've been born a Brit, I would have been so good at it.}

B.